Ärge unustage ema vaimset ja füüsilist tervist.

Tihti on välja kujunenud, et ema ainult hoolitseb beebi eest, sest ei osata isa kaasta või kardetakse ühiskonna reaktsiooni jättes beebi kellegi teise hoolde.
Tegelikult ma soovitan päevas vähemalt tund ema enda aega. Mida see tähendab? See tähendab, et beebi on kellegagi väljas jalutuskäigul või hoolitseb tema eest keegi kodus. Olgu selleks siis lapse isa või tore naabritädi.

Ajad on muutunud ja enne lapse sündi on naine tööl käinud, mitte ainult koduperenaine olnud.

Kui 30 aastat tagasi tulid vanavanemad appi hoolitsema majapidamise ja äsja sünnitanud ema eest või elas mitu põlvkonda ühe katuse all, siis tänapäeva vanavanemad töötavad ja paljud pered on üle ilma laiali. Mõningatel juhtudel hoopis teises riigis end sisse seadnud.

Piiramatu ligipääs internetile on tegelikult suurt segadust tekitav info ülekülluse osas ja gruppid kus värsked lapsevanemad teatavad, et nende kuu vanune maimuke ütleb emme või tahab juba käima hakkata. See omakorda tekitab palju küsimusi teistes emades, kelle lapsed samu asju ei tee ja nii mõnigi kord lõppeb see külastusega arsti juurde, et välja selgitada, kas laps ikka areneb eakohaselt.

Kohtudes paljude emadega ja rääkides, kuidas neil on organiseeritud “oma aeg”, siis tihti paar esimest kuud kuni aasta peale beebi sündi seda aega ei ole. Kuid see millise õhinaga räägitakse esimesest poeskäigust või jalutuskäigust ilma beebita on samavõrdne lotovõiduga! 😊

Seega, palun võimaldada emale oma aega. See mida ta selle ajaga teeb on tema enda otsustada, kuid ma võin lubada, et pärast väikest pausi on ta energilisem ema ja parem kaasa oma mehele, sest ta on õnnelik naine!

Ilusat kolmapäeva soovides,
Kadi

Do not forget the mental and physical health of a mother. I cannot stress this enough.

For some reason it’s normal for a new mom to be left with all the responsibility, either because of the uncertainty on how to get the father involved or because of their fear that they are not good enough in the eyes of others.

Actually I would recommend for the new mom to take at least one hour just for herself. So what does this mean? This means that someone else is either outside on a stroll with the baby or looks after the baby at home. Whether it is the baby’s father or a lovely auntie, this time is very important for the mom.

Times have changed and before the baby was born, this beautiful woman had done so many things in life.

When 30 years ago grandparents came down to look after the household and the new mother, or if many generations lived under the same roof and helped out with the daily tasks, then nowadays grandparents are mostly still in workforce or live somewhere far away. In some cases they may even be living in a completely different country.

Even the unlimited access to Internet can be more confusing than helpful as there is too much information out there. Some fresh parents can brag about their baby trying to walk or trying to say mommy even after barely reaching 1 months of age. This creates a lot of questions and stress in other moms whose children do not do the same thing. Quite often this ends with a visit to the doctor’s office where they try to find out if their child is developing as he or she should.

After meeting many moms over the years, we have discussed how they have organised their ‘time for themselves’. And I hear it quite often that for a couple of months until a full year after the birth they do not have this time. Then imagine their enthusiasm when they are telling a story of their first grocery shopping or a walk on their own, alone, and how that seemed to equal to a lottery win!

So, please do allow this new mom some time for herself. What she does with it is completely up to her, but I can promise that after a small break she is more energetic and full of life because she is a happy woman!

Wishing you a beautiful afternoon,

Kadi

Kuidas valida lapsehoidjat?

Vahel küsitakse minult mitu korda päevas, “kuskohast ma võiksin leida hea lapsehoidja?” või “tead sa kedagi head?”. Minu esimene vastus sellele küsimusele on alati, “ma ei tea”. Ja sellele järgneb küsimus, “kuidas sa ei tea?” Seda väga lihtsal põhjusel, sest igaühe nõudmised ja soovid hoidja osas on erinevad.
Kuid, ma saan esitada mõningad küsimused, mis annavad suuna hoidja leidmisel.

Küsi endalt:
Kas hoidja peab olema nagu Sina?
Kui sa oled enamus päevast hõivatud arvuti- või telefoniga, kas sellist hoidjat sooviksid oma lapsele?
Või kui sa oled aktiivne, käid beebikoolis, ujumas, pargis, metsas ja sõbrustad paljude teiste beebiemmedega – kas hoopis aktivisti tüüpi hoidja sobib teie vajadustele?
Kas töötundide osas võiks olla pigem kellaajast kellaajani inimene, või hoopis keegi paindlik?
Vahel on vaja lennata tööasjus teise riiki ja lend on hommikul vara, või hoopis kestab koosolek oodatust kauem – siis tead, et eelnevalt läbi rääkides hoidjaga aitab sind hädast välja. Kas hoidja on õigeaegselt kohal või pead sa teda igal hommikul taga ajama, sest kohusetunne inimesel puudub, siis tasuks ehk mõelda, mis sobib sinu vajadustega.
Kas sa oled valmis, et su laps saab suureks sõbraks-, kallistab- ja jagab oma emotsioone veel kellegi teisega peale sinu?

Tihti tekkib ema poolt tõrge hoidja suhtes, kui laps ootab millal saab hoidjaga koos midagi põnevat teha ja see tekitab pahameelt-, armukadedust- ja süütunnet emas, et ta pole piisavalt hea või teeb midagi valesti. See on täiesti vale mõtlemine, sest ühelegi lapsele ei saa tema ema keegi asendada.

Kui minult küsida, millised oleks hea hoidja tunnused ja kus kohast teda leida, siis panin kirja mõned punktid mida enda lastele hoidjat valides järgiks:
1. Erialalne haridus, esmaabi koolitus läbitud, karistusregister puhas.
2. Paindlik (kellaaegade osas), kohusetundlik, õpihimuline.
3. Aktiivne, viibiks lapsega võimalikult palju värskes õhus.
4. Teeks lapsega koos süüa ja arendaks lapse maitsemeeli.
5. Räägiks loomadest ja loodusest ning võimalusel külastaks miniloomaaedu, erinevaid parke, muuseume ja raamatukogusid.
6. Arendaks last keeleliselt, st. ei istuks ise telefonis ja last ei paneks tahvelarvuti- või teleka ette.
7. Mitte suitsetav, parfüüme-, küünelakke- ja kreeme tööajal mitte kasutav. (lapsed on väga tundlikud lõhnade osas)

Kuidas sellist toredat inimest kohata, kes vastaks sinu ootustele, lootustele ja vajadustele?
Kuuluta võimalikult paljudes erinevates internetikeskkondades , jaga oma facebooki kontol ja palu soovijatel cv koos motivatsioonikirjaga saata. Tutvu kõigi kanditaatide cv-de ja motivatsioonikirjadega, kui need ei vasta sinu soovidele, siis palun saada kiri ja täna kanditeerimast. Sobivate kanditaatidega kohtu ja võimalusel võta laps kaasa, et saaks näha kuidas laps reageerib antud hoidja kanditaadiga.
Kui midagi jääb sind häirima kohtumisel, siis otsusta sellise hoidja kasuks, kes sobib sinuga kohe. Hoidja valikul usalda oma sisetunnet.

Päikeselist reedet!
Kadi

How to choose a nanny?

I often get questions along the lines of ‘where can I find a good nanny?’ or ‘can you recommend me a nanny?’ My first response is usually ‘I don’t know’, and that is always followed by a question ‘how don’t you know?’
Let me explain, there’s a good reason for that.
This is because everyone has different requirements and expectations in regards to a nanny. Although, I can help you a little bit and can give you a guideline on what to consider which helps you narrow down your perfect nanny.
Ask yourself:
Does the nanny have to be like you?
If you are usually occupied with your laptop or with your phone, is that the same kind of nanny you would want to take care of your child(ren)? Or if you are physically and socially active – maybe you would need an active nanny who would take your child(ren) swimming, to parks, and to help them socialise.
Would you need your nanny to be there between a specific timeframe or would you need someone more flexible?
Sometimes if you do need to take an early flight somewhere or leave the house early, ask if you are able to count on the nanny to be there on time. Or is she someone you will have to call constantly to ensure that she’s not going to be late?
Are you going to be alright with the fact that your child(ren) will have someone else to take care of them and to share their joys with apart from you?
Sometimes it can be hard on a mother if their child(ren) look forward for their nanny to arrive to do something exciting, and this can create ill feelings such as guilt, jealousy and the feeling of not being good enough. This is definitely not the case, please do keep in mind that a mother can never be replaced.

If someone asks me, what should they look for in a nanny and where to find them, I have noted down a couple of points to consider if I would have to choose:
1. Specialised education, first aid course must be done, no previous criminal records.
2. Flexible (in regards to time), responsible, always learning new things.
3. Active, would spend as much time in fresh air with the children as possible.
4. Would cook with the children to expand their food palate.
5. Would talk about animals and nature, and if possible, visit mini zoos, different parks, museums and libraries with the children.
6. Would help children socialise and express themselves (this means that the nanny should not be engaged in their phones all the time and would not let children watch TV or play with a tablet unnecessarily)
7. Non-smoker. Additionally should not wear perfume, nail varnish or heavily scented moisturisers as children are extremely sensitive to different scents.

So where to meet such a wonderful person who would meet your expectations and requirements?
I would advise to advertise this in different communities, share it on your Facebook page and ask applicants to send in their CV with a motivational letter. Please do take time to read through all applications, and if they do not meet your requirements, please send a letter to thank them for applying.
Get in contact with your prospective nannies and if possible, take your child(ren) with you so that you can see how they interact. If there is something that does not feel right, then choose the applicant that you connect the best with instead of only relying on their CV.
You always have to trust your instincts.

Have a wonderful sunny morning!

Kadi

Teen algust blogiga!

Igapäevaselt nõustan paljusid lapsevanemaid erinevatel teemadel, selleks, et oma teadmisi- ja kogemusi rohkemate inimestega jagada erinevates maailma nurkades hakkan blogi pidama.

Blogi on suunatud absoluudselt kõigile, kel pere planeerimine käsil, üleannetud lapselapsed aias kassi sabast tirimas või plaanid vahetada eriala nagu mina seda tegin ja hakkata tööle beebide/väikelastega.

Vahel on nii raske, et lihtsalt lukustad ennast vannituppa, et nutta peatäis, – ma püüan sinust aru saada ja käsitlen selles blogis erinevaid teemasid, alustades enda ette valmistamisest raseduseks ja kuidas mitte hulluks minna kogu selles beebi/laste maailmas.

Kirjutan raamatutest ja jagan oma kogemusi ning mõtteid perega seotud teemadel.

Omapäraseks muudab blogi see, et kirjutan vahetuid emotsioone mõnest toredast seigast oma igapäeva elus ja reisimisest.

Püüan säilitada huumorisoone ja sarkasmi ning kirjutada asjadest ilma ilustamata.

 

Let’s get this blog started!

Nowadays I get numerous questions from parents all over the world and also provide specialised consultations. And with this thought I have understood that I want to share what I have learned, which is how I have decided to start a blog.

This blog is meant for absolutely every single person who is either planning a family or already has one, whose naughty grandchildren are currently pulling a cat’s tail in the backyard or who are planning to change their field of work (like I did) and start working with babies and/or toddlers.

I know that sometimes it can be so hard and overwhelming that you lock yourself in the bathroom and cry your heart out – I can completely understand this, and in this blog I plan to discuss different aspects of parenthood, from preparing for pregnancy to how to stay sane in this world filled with babies and toddlers.

I also plan to share what I am currently reading and share my experiences and thoughts on the topic of family itself and everything it includes.

This blog is especially special and a baby on my own as I also share my day-to-day activities which, believe me, is never boring and is always filled with many mind-boggling things that can be at times hard to comprehend. Additionally, my second passion to travel will be reflected within the posts as well.

I will try to maintain my unique sense of humour and sarcasm, and always promise to give you the whole truth without hiding anything.

 

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